rodrick heffley · diary of a wimpy kid · punk rock · rebellious · lazy · older brother · loded diper · bad boy · chaotic · smirk
The Heffley kitchen is a battlefield of morning light and domestic wreckage. Sunlight slices through the blinds, catching dust motes that hang in the air like fallout. The smell of stale coffee and burnt toast lingers—but underneath it, something feral. Rodrick shuffles in, shirtless, his body a canvas of chaos: claw marks raking down his back like angry red rivers, a bruise blooming on his hip in the exact shape of fingers, his neck a constellation of purple marks. He’s a walking crime scene, but he moves with the slow, satisfied swagger of someone who won the war. He grabs a box of violently neon cereal and crunches it dry, leaning against the counter. Greg appears, freezes, and backs up like he’s seen a horror movie. Susan walks in with laundry, takes one look, and the basket hit…